More ridiculous offers from internet con artists

I’m just adding to the list of junky con artists who are out to hurt us via the internet.  In my previous blog I listed a few of them who emailed me.

Here they are under their phoney names.  There are a few more of them as well which my readers should keep in mind.

“Oliver Miller”

“Vanessa” who started off by informing me I had won a $500 voucher from Woolworths .  Since  then that offer has been increased to $1000 from “Emma”.

I have a Coles offer from Portugal and “Anna” is  demanding immediate action  or I’ll miss out on the millions  “she” is giving me.

Good old “Sam” and “Samuel B” are still at it. So is  “Sara”.  Then there is  “Jen” who is thanking me for my nonexistent purchase.

And of course there are the free spins from PlayMillion,  a gambling group who want to snare me into gambling or whatever their real organisation is offering.

Another suspect is Royale 500, a gambling junk mail.

No doubt the list will go on.

Perhaps I’ll hear from God himself

 

All about junk and my new “pals”

For the past couple of months I have won a popularity contest, or so it seems.  New friends, business colleagues,  offers of jobs and money, money, money are being thrust at me.

Because I’m special,  or so it seems.

My new email pal, “Oliver Miller”,  is offering hundreds of free spins if I click on his gambling website. Another generous soul,  “Sam”, informs me that there is a fortune waiting for me and all I have to do, apparently,  is tell him which bank to lodge it with.

“Vanessa”  has a $500 voucher for me from Woolworths and a $200 voucher from Bunnings.  Of course, Woolworths and Bunnings  have never heard of these offers.  I had phoned these two companies as well as Coles  to let them know about these  “prizes.”

What a shock to learn that “Vanessa” was not telling me the truth and here I was thinking that I’m a winner!

These generous email pals had even arranged a mortgage on a new home.  And I haven’t even asked for one!

I’ve even got a new job guarantee waiting for me and “Sam” is becoming impatient with me and wondering why I haven’t taken up this offer which  “is running out unless I agree immediately”.

“Cory”  and “Emily”, “Samuel B” and “Zoe Kent” as well as “Charlotte Jones”  are all out there in this wonderful internet world eager to bring joy and happiness to my life.

All I have to do is believe them and let them make my day.

 

 

Woolworths Australia has acted on my complaint at last.

A few weeks ago I phoned the Woolworths Head Office to suggest that it should do something about a problem with the barbecued chickens it was selling.

I had noticed that the string that was being used to secure the legs of the chickens was exactly the same colour as the roasted chickens themselves.  The string had to be removed before eating and if it weren’t removed prior to serving it could present a danger to anyone swallowing and choking on it accidentally.

For that reason I suggested that the string should not be brown but should be green or blue so that it could be easily identified and removed.

Well,  today I am pleased to report that the string is navy blue.  It is easy to see and cut off.

One small step for mankind……….

 

Johnny Depp ‘s arrogance is king-size

We in Australia believe that everyone, even celebrities,  should obey the law.  That goes for the “ordinary” human being as well as the visiting megastars such as Johnny Depp.

Depp may not care if animals brought into the country carry diseases which may infect our animal population, but we do. We are determined to protect our livestock and that is why there is a quarantine rule which prevents overseas visitors, no matter who they are, to declare that they have animals with them and agree to place them in quarantine.

Apparently,  Mr Depp who suffers from a swelled head has decided that the law should not apply to him.  Surely, it’s only for mere mortals, says Mr Depp.  “My little doggies are as special as I am.”

Ironically, it turns out to be the case, for sure

So when he was caught with a couple of  illegal puppies in his entourage he flew off in a huff and began to criticise the Deputy Prime Minister of Australia for threatening to take the canines away from him.

Depp has frequently made childish and petulant remarks  about Deputy PM Barnaby Joyce and the end result of these snide comments is that we are sick and tired of Depp.

The latest insult made by Depp is to describe Joyce as an inbred tomato, whatever that is. Perhaps Depp is familiar with inbreeding in vegetables.  His delusions of grandeur may encompass agriculture as well as everything else.

His lack of respect for our laws,  however,  has not won him any fans Downunder.

 

Warning for visitors to Melbourne

Among the many dangers in the city of Melbourne, such as being attacked and robbed by young men of “African appearance” there is now a new danger for people travelling by tram.

A person on a tram can now be robbed of a mobile phone simply by having it  grabbed from an unsuspecting user.  The violent thief then jumps from the tram at the next stop and disappears at the station with the stolen phone, leaving the victim traumatised.

This has already happened a few times on Melbourne trams. Apparently, the thieves have been tall African men who are causing much angst in our city.  There have also been three Bulgarians who have been charged for stealing from tram travellers.  And so I am compelled to warn visitors to Melbourne to be very vigilant and hold on to their phones.

It saddens me to declare this warning but Melbourne has become an extremely dangerous place for good people. There are home invasions with serious violence against the inhabitants. Cars are stolen and hijacked.

Women certainly have to think twice before venturing out on their own at night.

So much for  “the most livable city in the world”.

p.s    According to the Salvation Army and the Lord Mayor of Melbourne an added problem is the huge number of beggars in the city who become violent when someone refuses to donate to them.  This is quite frightening and must be off-putting to anyone visiting certain streets downtown.

In Australia the only thing that matters is sport.

I continue to be amazed by the Australian obsession with sport.  This is to the detriment of other fields of endeavour such as academic achievement,  culture,  business prowess,  for example.

Football, tennis, swimming and cricket take up half the news broadcasts.  Yes, it’s nice to be active and run and jump fast or whatever, but that does not make a nation great, in my opinion.  After all, these are just games and yet in Australia they take the place of  all other achievements.

In fact, if someone is talented in medicine or learning, then that success is disregarded. But if that same person can score a few runs in cricket, then he or she is venerated. This explains why so many  “Australians of the Year” have been sportsmen and women.

The disappointing feature of all this obsession is that there is lots of scandal and drug cheating with performance enhancing products,  so that it becomes  difficult to respect and trust the whole business.

Moreover,   if a sportsman behaves abominably then he is forgiven whereas if that same person were to behave like that in the business world he would have been fired.  I’m referring,  of course, to some of our footballers and currently to some of our better known tennis players.

In my opinion,  Bernard Tomic and  Nick Kyrgios bring shame to our country.  They may play tennis quite well but what a couple of spoilt brats they are!  They are short on sportsmanship or dignity in their playing.

What a contrast to the tennis players of the past who made us proud and did not embarrass our nation!

In all seriousness,  I am so disgusted by their lack of character that I barrack for their opponents whenever they play a match.

For crying out loud,   sport is sport and life is something else,  but when sport adopts the mantle of religious fanaticism,  it becomes ludicrous.  I hope that one day we will value the important fields of human achievement more than some foolish bugger’s ability to kick or catch or chase a ball.

It does remind me of Emperor Vespasian’s dictum that one should keep the masses amused,  hence the Colosseum

New name for Target and Kmart combined

Since Target is not flourishing, the management of Wesfarmers, owners of both brands,  are considering combining Kmart and Target stores

There have been some suggestions that the new name for this union should be Karget.  Not a good idea.  It has no resonance, no cachet, no appeal.

A better name and one that is optimistic and inclusive of the successful reputation of Kmart,  is

Kmart Plus

In my opinion, this covers all bases. It is forward-looking and includes Target as the Plus factor. In other words,  improvement.  Improvement is always good. Two for the price of one is also good and the shoppers who were loyal to Target will not have been forgotten. They are the Plus Factor in Kmart Plus.